Playwright vs Retail Employee
I am a Playwright. In a perfect world, if you were to ask me what my profession was, that would be the answer you get.
But the world isn’t perfect and that is not what I typically say. Why not? Well, because the following obligatory questions usually consist of, “Oh? What have you written?” or “Have you written anything I can see in the theatre?” And that’s where the conversation begins to halt.
I’ve only had one full length play produced so far, and it’s hard to explain a 90-117 page play conversationally. Try it. Right now, before you read any further. Explain, out loud, a very quick plot synopsis of The Crucible in just 2-3 sentences. I’ll wait.

Here’s some inspiration if you are stuck:

What did you come up with? Probably something like: “It’s a play about the Salem Witch Trials.” Or if you are feeling particularly adventurous: “It’s a play about one man’s battle to find personal salvation and his family’s forgiveness… While a bunch of puritans act all kinds of puritan-y.”
Excellent job. Thanks for your participation. The point i’m trying to make here is that there aren’t a whole lot of places to go after that. Here are the easy routes:

• Full Synopsis – Too long, also kind of risky if you don’t have things copy written.
• Themes and Symbolism – Hard for someone to follow if they haven’t read/seen the play.
• Take Plot Suggestions – No. Just… No I don’t want to hear them.

And just for the sake of taking this hypothetical all the way to the end of the road. Let’s say you were the writer of Edward Albee’s The Goat. Imagine trying to describe that in a couple of sentences… at a superbowl party… to a drunk person.

So instead, when I am asked, I usually tell people that I am do tech support for a major technology retail chain. Usually followed by the obligatory questions:

• “What are your discounts?” – If we just met… none of your business.
• “Can you look at my electronic?” – Yeah, next time I am clocked in and at work.
• “When is the next ____ coming out?” – The board of directors told me, but they asked me not to say anything.

Come to think of it… Saying that I am a Playwright is way more interesting. I guess the lesson I have to learn is the more work I do, the more things i’ll have to talk about. Maybe my next post will be about becoming a prolific playwright so I have lots of things to talk about.
While I am working towards that goal… Maybe I will just mumble something and then say: “What about you? What do you do for a living?”

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• Currently reading: Stardust by Neil Gaiman
• Last movie watched: O Brother Where Art Thou?
• Album on Repeat: Communion by Years and Years